5/29/16           7 Lavers Pond Rd, Freeport, Maine


Back on land for exactly two weeks, almost to the hour . We've refinished floors in two rooms of our house. We've located the tax records that have been missing since we started looking for them last week. They are with my NC cousin, Dale, left with him for safe keeping way back in October. Gotta get those back to complete our 2015 taxes. I've planted most of my flower pot garden and hired our next door neighbor to mow the leech field. I danced for two hours with my wonderful Authentic Movement friends last week. I've made several trips to sis-in-law, Sharyl's, to visit and help with some cleaning and organizing. I've seen 4 of Maggie's lacrosse games and heard her spring concert. She's a fierce  LAX defense player and an accomplished flutist. Both David and I have had eye exams and individual medical consults/exams. Amelia is adjusting to land life, as are we. Goodness, I love this house and site and neighbors and family and land-based friends. Goodness, I miss being on the boat and on the water.

My Garden!

Amelia relaxing at home

Our house feels too big. We moved all the living room furniture into David's room while refinishing the floor and I love living in his room. Cozy...like the boat. There is more to take care of here on land and I don't have the energy, time or desire to do all the required activities to manage and sustain all this space. And I love the space. I'm having difficulty holding all these contradictory feelings and realizations. Is it time to downsize? Get a roommate? How about a condo? Or senior housing? Not senior housing here in the winter.

Mail sort - one of many sorting projects

Some realizations - I don't want to spend 8 months on the boat again, traveling. Would 8 months but NOT traveling be okay? Or 6 months living/traveling? I loved our adventure and the learning and all, all, all the friends and helpers we made and met along the way.  I love the new skills I have and David has. I love the confidence we each have...in ourselves, in each other and in Grace. We're thinking how to get Grace south this fall without my having to do all the trip with David. Maybe get him some help going as far as NC and leaving the boat there for a couple of months while he comes back. Then we both join the boat after Christmas (?) to go farther south. We figured it was 40 travel days, ME to FL. Perhaps we could do a month to NC or even three weeks. Park and come back to Maine for a couple months? As a southern/winter port, Marathon was good for me and we both enjoyed the community there. I'm not committing to the Bahamas now (having just arrived back in Freeport) but I'm willing to consider considering it as a future trip, especially if I haven't spent 4.5 months getting to the Keys. And/but what to do about having a boat in Maine during the summer if we decide to leave Grace south for the summer, thus avoiding all the travel time back and forth?

I want to change my language regarding "work".  New possible words: rearranging, playing, renovating, upgrading, enjoying, being, resting, refinishing, decorating, cleaning, visiting, imagining, watching, looking, dancing (of course), planning....  Our/my habit is to call everything work...working on the house, working on the boat, working in the yard, working on the boat shed. If we're going to call it work then I'm not going to do it. So there! I'll clean the interior. I'll scrape the bottom. I'll haul the dirt. I'll cover the shed. But I'm tired of working. And, anyway, "working" is an excuse for not doing other things I/we might not want to do as much as "messing around on boats" to quote a favorite book of David's or "digging in the dirt", a favorite activity of mine. And "working" is not nearly as descriptive as all those other above words. I AM changing my language and encouraging David to do the same or at least examine why/how "working on" is so compelling a choice of language. Of course, some things ARE work - somewhat hard and somewhat distasteful.

 I want to do some land traveling. I want to go to NC. I think I want to drive there and do some visiting or sight-seeing along the way. I'm very aware that I have fewer years ahead of me than behind me. I'm not clear how I want to focus my time for these years ahead. I know I love dancing. I know I love David. I want to be present rather than using time/energy uselessly in efforts to control my future. I want to plan as much as possible so that I get the future I might think I might want. I remember a consultant friend from years ago saying "We're going to have a future (if we're lucky) so what is your preferred future?" I have multiple "preferred futures" and doubt that I'll get all of them. Ho hum. In some few cases I have had "preferred pasts" and I couldn't have all of them either.

Dear. Dear. I'd hoped to innumerate so many "realizations" and now I've only a few in my brain. I know there were more but just as I don't have my elevator speech to let people know of the fullness of our 8-month boating journey I don't have a concise list of learnings. Already, what I might have learned alludes language. Perhaps, hopefully, all those learnings and experiences have already become part of my DNA...and/or I've forgotten them.

Now that forgetting makes me pensive and a little sad on this grey day before Memorial Day.

5/16/16             Monday          Freeport


A break in the blogging action since we're no longer Sailing on Grace this week...and some decisions to be made about if/how to continue this particular blog.

Arrived back in our land-based home yesterday (Sunday). Sharyl and Shannon met us at the yacht club. Wonderful to see them and so appreciative that we have them to return home to. David and Sharyl went to our favorite breakfast cafe. Shannon and I went to pick up Maggie from her flute lesson, get their car then we joined Sharyl and David for a welcome home breakfast. We caught up pretty well w/Mags and will take some more time this week to do the same Sharyl and Shannon.

Coming to our Lavers Pond home....I was scared. So much space. So much stuff. What will I like? What will I not like? How has the house aged in our absence? David and I shivered our shoulders, held hands and walked in. Empty energy in the house...there was no liveliness. A house waiting. Shan and Mags had left a great surprise of flowers and brownie mix on the dining table, as well as milk, bread, TP, cheese and strawberries in the frig. Well, the TP wasn't in the frig but you get the point.

The house is so BIG. No wonder we have so much stuff. You know, nature hates a vacuum. If I have space I need to fill it. Oh NO! However, the luxuries of our queen size bed, hot shower, water as much as I want (oh NO. Ration and conserve!), internet access without overusing telephone data plan...all things we lived without on the boat...oh, and electricity without rationing...are terrific....and excessive...and no longer taken for granted.

I do truly want to downsize. Not move or sell the house but shrink my possession load. But then I love my flower pot from Greece and the "carnival" pot from my parent's home and most of my dance and arts education books ("buzzer sound" - in case I need them in the future). Oh woe. What to do? Well, nothing at the moment. No immediate decision is necessary except to finish and re-distribute the laundry. And take a walk.

Wanting to be disciplined about how/on what I focus my attention and energy. Definitely Maggie's lacrosse game this afternoon and a visit w/Sharyl early this week.

"Live the life you love and love the life you live", perhaps mis-quoted from Chicago but the sentiment is there.

Last trip photos:  

Ocean trash

David and I made a habit of picking up trash along the beaches and waterways when it was safe (in the ocean). We managed to keep 5 balloons out of the stomachs of fishes or seals. This spiderman did not become toxic food for an animal or entangle any with its ribbons.

Pound of Tea from ocean side w/Harraseekett tower

 David's photo of Pound of Tea (below) is from the ocean side. Pound of Tea is at the entrance/exit of the Harraseekett River and our harbor. Notice the castle tower above the tree line on the left.

Empty harbor waiting for warmer weather

We've pretty much outrun spring though there are definite signs of it here. Small leaves on the softwood trees, definitely green/yellow and pink with new growth across the pond. We had a fire in the wood stove last night and even turned the furnace when we arrived. Definitely not FL temperatures and definitely not shorts weather yet. A visit from neighbor Sue caught us up on a bit of Lavers Pond news.

We're happy. We're safe. We're proud of our accomplishing this journey. We're proud of each other and of Amelia who has earned her sailor-cat eye patch. We're pleased to be home. We're grateful, forever, for all the help that has made this particular journey possible.

Blessings abound and our blessings continue to unfold.

6/14/16      Saturday             Freeport, Maine


HOME!
sigh.
Almost exactly 8 months away
What a journey
So much learned, confidence built - about/in self, David, our relationship
How full can one 3/4 year be???
How blessed can a couple of lives (well, three counting Amelia) be?
Thanking all my angels, those living and those past
And a major shout-out and appreciation to Captain David Webster - husband, teacher, playmate, risk-taker, navigator, companion extraordinaire. I'm so appreciative of his skills in so many things and his diligence about safety and his ability to create/make do/improvise. Phew. I'm pretty lucky to be his mate and travel - travel/journeying in so many meanings - companion.

We had an easier boating today. Beautiful sun and the wind was milder and seas laid down better. We left our "Dirt" mooring in the Annisquam River around 6:00 AM and went way out - 10 miles - into the ocean. I was considering how different our last sail day home was from our first sail day out last fall.  Winds of up to 20 kts are common and I go easily at 15 kts rather than 4 or 5 in the fall; choppy seas of 3-4 foot waves and 4 second intervals are uncomfortable but not scary; boating for 8 - 12 hours is tiring but not impossible and fine if it gets us to or closer to our goal; we have greater trust of each other at the helm.

We both became more pensive as we got into more familiar territory. Still missed stopping at Ben and Sarah's in Portsmouth area. Still didn't get to Isle of Shoals. So much still to do in this world, people and places to visit. A true highlight of this trip now concluding is the people we met, the friends we've made. What joy!

Boone Light

This lighthouse is on a barren island. The base is flanged out and is lovely. David tells a story of going to it with Capt. Lecain and climbing to the light and taking a photo of the light as it flashed.

We passed to within 1/2 mile in very deep water. Usually we are miles and miles from it on our travels. We were way out in the ocean today!

Lobster pots today but not nearly as crowded as they will get as the warm season wears on. Hmmm. Lobster sounds good. Maybe sometime next week.

2 lights at Cape Elizabeth. Getting close

Bustins and L'il

We are truly in our front yard now as we pass these two islands. Next is Crab and then Pound of Tea. There is a new Red Nun #4 in our harbor entrance. That just proves it. NOTHING stays the same.

We arrived at our mooring at 5:08 or 1708 hrs. For some reason I was at the helm. Oh, David was taking photos. Without our regular boat landmarks - uh, water marks - I thought we were going to have to meander all through our end of the mooring field, guessing "maybe that one is ours". Nope, motored right up to it. Luck. We did some tidying up on the deck, pumped up and deployed our dinghy. That was a challenge. Came inside for a congratulatory drink. My heart is full. My brain doesn't know what to do.  We're home....after 8 months living aboard and traveling to the south east end of continental United States. I'm still trying to grok that as concept and as reality.

We realized that the HYC opening party is now (when we realized it) just over there on shore. Got ourselves ready to go...shoes, jackets...and I had a melt down. Couldn't do it. Could not bring myself to leave the boat and dive into a large party of people. Just did NOT want to be with lots of people making small talk. This last night of this journey is to momentous to dilute with other people, especially ones I don't know well. I'm not ready for elevator speeches about our 8 month journey. I wanted to just be on the boat with David and Amelia, listen to Maine Public Radio, have dinner, look at the view, watch the light change. That was clear. David agreed to not go, also. Phew.

So, an end.  Re-entry has begun. View from our accommodations tonight:

Pound of Tea - marks/guards the entrance to our river

And now the next...continuing....journey begins.

5/13/16        Friday               Anniquam River


Luxurious morning of sleeping until 7:00 AM. Made coffee and took it out on the aft deck. Did a couple of sun salutes and warriors, being gentle given my injured knee. David was still sleeping so I had one of my land-based mornings of quiet. Great opportunity, that I take every chance I get, to appreciate where I am and be grateful to all those shoulders I stand or kneel on - all the ancestors and current friends who've helped me get here, whether they know of their assistance or not....whether I know of their existence or not, I'm grateful. Grateful, too, that my friend, John, came through his surgery with very successful results. This morning was a tearful, grateful morning, one of those times when the good fortune is just about too much to take in, Grace, indeed.. Loved being outside. Loved that it was light and quiet. Loved that I was on our boat and that David and Amelia were safe below. Loved that I am right here, exactly where I am meant to be.

I started making notes for blog when my favorite osteopath, Dr. Steve, returned my call to him from last evening. What an amazing injury he has had and story to go with it. Ow. Ow. Ow.  Ruptured disk in lumbar, not repaired soon enough, caused instability of lower lumbar and squeezing of lower vertebra, resulting in need to remove parts of vertebra covering spinal cord and screws to stabilize backbone until bone graft takes effect. Ow! Totally painful and a long recovery time. I needed him to tell me so much about his injury. What a painful mess. He will recover but such a long recovery time. I'm relieved to know that he has a pretty strong support system but want to visit or see him somehow. Shouldn't be hard to do.

I told Steve that I'd called his office to make an appointment for him to look at my knee, swollen as it is and tender/painful in some places...feeling unstable and unreliable on the boat. He listen and suggested some wearing away and stressing due to many years of tibia torque. I'm thinking that is "old dancer knee syndrome" (ODKS) or maybe (ODMOSKS) "Old dancer meets old sailor knee syndrome." I was thinking that when sitting at the helm my pelvis becomes the gyroscope for my body and my chest and head respond to/ counter my pelvis, movement in order to keep balance (and keep the old, rickety director's chair from crashing to the floor. But, when standing my knees become the gyroscope with lots of multi-directional stress on that amazing joint. That stressful motion plus my extreme squats (for peeing)...and the many, many years of forcing ballet turnout...did these cute knees in, made them much older than the rest of me. Steve said adjustments and some exercises could address the tibia torque but not the age and already deteriorated mechanism. Options exist. Meanwhile, aspirin, elevation, knee pad, rest until I get home.

We left our friends this morning without saying goodbye., thinking they would be sleeping in after arriving around 10 PM last eve. They anchored across the narrow channel from us. David saw them arrive but I'd gone to bed.

mizzen, main, ginny flying
along with the prayer flags

Odd! We had 3 of our 4 sails up today and they were all working on our behalf. We were sailing! Sheldon would have been proud. Still had the engine running because we wanted to go more than 4.5 knots, but we were sailing, not just motoring. Sailing AFTER we came through the Cape Cod Canal which was a very different experience than coming south last fall. David timed this entrance so perfectly. Calm. Calm. Calm waterway. We decided to not visit Dwight at Duxbury and, rather, headed straight to Gloucester. Lots of open water between CCC and Gloucester. The seas kicked up about 3/4 way across Massachusetts Bay. Winds to 20 knots but mostly around 16 and seas at Starboard quarter. Rocking and rolling but not pounding.

We stopped at Brown's Boat Services for fuel. Valerie came back after her errands to open so we could get fuel. I got a shower, too, and we gave Val a new crossword puzzle book. Standing joke w/her about the crosswords. Then through the Blymann draw bridge and into the Annisquam River canal. I'll miss being called Captain by the bridge tenders. No more lift bridges on our route north.

Houses along the river are lovely and spring, which is slow here, has some amazing greens and bright yellows.

For Sale

 More thinking about home and the re-entry into the complications of land. On the boat we are very much,as if on an island with limited access to everything and everybody. That will be very different when we return. All the people we love and want to see and be seen by. Much will have changed. My next door neighbor has died. A hole in my local community. The social ambitions and/or perceived obligations and all the "stored" STUFF. Yikes. Shannnoooonnnn! And all the collected mail AND the TAXES!!! And the floor sanding, then the boat re-do. Some things are definitely easier on board. I understand trepidation and ambivalence of returning from sea that some friends express. And I'm anxious (in all its subtles) to be home.

Yellow house on Hill

Meandering through this river/canal,  really IS beautiful. We are at high tide so no worries about depth. We saw this amazing, old Crosby Yawl. It was large (40'?), blue with a natural color canopy over the cockpit, half dozen men in foul weather gear in cockpit sipping drinks as they cruised around in the rain. The 91 year old boat had just been launched. It was pumping water out a porthole, wood still swelling, I assume. Probably they were yacht club members but YC hasn't put mooring balls out. So, we asked the men if anyone knew a mooring ball we could have for free. Yes. There. So we did. And we'll leave really early tomorrow. The boat and occupants were wonderful. Reminded me a great deal of dance camp at Bates.

Falling asleep here. time for bed.

5/12/16      Thursday        Onset, MA

Pine Island Sunrise

This was an easy one, though long, with lots of alone time at the helm while David napped. Reflection and fantasy and ambition investigation time. We decided that long, restful, time-off, naps were more valuable than our short cat naps of days past. This decision to rest longer and really be off watch is a sign of our confidence in each other's abilities and decision-making. I'm honored that he has that confidence in me even though we don't necessarily agree on how/when/where of boating decisions.

Due to good luck and David's planning we flew along Fisher Island and into RI Sound on up to Buzzards Bay. Figured we averaged 8.5 mph which is pretty clipping along for Grace. Still a 10 hour travel day so we were ready to be in our port of the evening.

We were in Onset on our way south but I was so traumatized by Cape Cod Canal entrance (extreme washing machine with stuff sliding and flying everywhere, me at helm) that I don't remember Onset at all. A true "cheated death again" experience as I recall. We'll enter differently going north, timing the current and watching the wind wind more appropriately now that we have more experience.

We arrived around 4:00 PM (1600 nautical time) and needed to change the oil. Perfect. Lots of time before dark to change oil and have relaxed dinner, maybe on aft deck. Oil change with new adapter should be a piece of cake. I'll start dinner prep. Oops! Three hours later, much swearing and sweat, new adapted tools which included a large, sturdy screw driver, LOTS of paper towels and unfortunately few deep breathes......

Snarl!

Kill that filter

What a mess. The filter was stuck on the adapter, the same adapter that was supposed to make oil change more simple. David's masculine strength did him/us in. After removing the adapter from the engine block we stabbed the filter with the screw driver in order to get enough leverage (using other improvised tools) to unscrew it. SUCCESS!!! New oil filter. New oil. Good to go....after clean up.

Chatted w/Shannon (she called to tell us about bills) and told her David and I were about to have a fight now, that we were both tired. I said we were almost in New England - me defining NE as through the Cape Cod Canal. David corrected me saying "we are already in New England." "I'll define New England anyway I want," I said. Our fights are sort of like which side of the plate the peas go on. Besides, what does conventional wisdom and agreement about geography have to do with emotional wisdom about geography?!? I maintain: the north side of the Cape Cod Canal is where New England starts for me! And I'm sticking to it.

My knee is injured, swollen, tender behind, above and beside. Wearing my dance knee pad for support. Going up and down stairs, always leading w/left leg so I don't have to bend that knee. Soft tissue injury, I think from so much extreme flexion - squatting to pee of all things. Contacted friend, Steve, for advice and appointment for him to investigate, maybe manipulate. Feeling more vulnerable than any time this journey, relative to my own strength and flexibility. Oh No! Steve's office said he was out with an injury for several months. Left him a message on his cell phone.

Thinking of getting home and the rather LARGE task of redistributing  or releasing (my new best word!) to others, resell store or dump so much stuff from our house, basement and boat shed. We’ve been away from lots of stuff. Hoping to take this sabbatical-from-stuff experience as an opportunity to downsize. An article from Next Avenue suggests that at some point there is “more past than future” to our lives. Downsizing allows us to live more in the present. I'm going with that knowing I have strong attachments to some of my stuff.

We're back in the land of lobster traps!

Port Judith, harbor of refuge
Didn't need it this trip. Grateful

5/11/16          Thursday          Pine Island, CT (mouth of Thames River, near New London)

A loooong, beautifully boring day of motoring. We did put up sails but the wind was so light and fluky it slowed us down rather than helped us. We bucked the current for several hours but were helped by the current more often than not. Calm, calm seas. Highest wind was 12 kts. Our boat barely sails with less than 15 kts.

Our buddies left before we got up this morning, knowing that we can travel faster than they. Starting 1 hour behind them we didn’t catch up until we both stopped at Branford River Yacht Club for fuel.

Hobbit House

On the way into the harbor this cute house on our port side has a rock foundation and "eyebrows" over the windows 

hardscaping

This house on our starboard side had amazing land/hard-scaping.

Gary and Jayne were staying there overnight in order to visit Jayne’s friend. They’ll start very early again tomorrow.

We continued so that our jumps these next two days of good weather will, hopefully, get us through the Cape Cod Canal and onto Duxbury, MA from wince our boat came. We want to stop and visit Dwight and his staff. I’m embracing this stop since David relented on the idea of maybe not going to Shelter Island or Mystic Seaport Museum. And it is supposed to rain, maybe storm over the weekend. We’ll have to look at that weather carefully. Not wanting to repeat a Scituate experience from 2 years ago.

Waters were choppy at the mouths of the 2 big rivers - Conn and Thames - but otherwise calm. We pulled into an anchorage at Pine Island hoping to pick one of two reported guest moorings. Couldn't find them, perhaps not yet in the water for "the season." Couldn't get our anchor to hold so "borrowed" a good looking mooring for the night. Great light show at the airport when a plane took off after dark. Runway lit with row of red, row of yellow and row of green lights and a white "chasser" light. Whoa! We must be near big deal civilization. Quick sleep again tonight.

5/10/16           Tuesday                        Port Washington, NY


Another early. Waited for enough light to see the buoys but were leading our buddies out of the Great Kills harbor before 5:30 AM. We needed to be across the Staten Island Sound, through the Verrazano Bridge,

Verrazano Bridge, NYC to the left

past Governor's Island with NYC in the background, and into the East River before 8:30 AM so as to catch the current and get swept up the river and through Hell Gate which is a convergence of tidal and river current energy that includes the Harlem and East Rivers coming together with water down Long Island Sound and in from the Atlantic Ocean. Lots of energy under THAT bridge.

Sunrise, another! Rockaway in the distance, I think

Smirk. We did it.

Gray (Dream Catcher) lead us into NYC having done the East River several times before. I had emailed/Facebooked my NYC buddies letting them know when we were going to be in the river and inviting them to come wave. Then I called and left message for Diana to come wave. She called but was walking across Central Park heading for the West Side to meet a client. We got to talk though.
I sat on the aft deck for all the time we were in the East River. Loved seeing NYC from the water and from the other direction. Obviously - me sitting on the aft deck - we were more relaxed about traveling in NYC on this return trip....and with Gary leading. I was bundled against chilled temperatures and wind but exhilarating to be outside, on our boat, David at the helm, traveling through NYC by water! Delicious and a total treat. Something about feeling confident? Returning to the City by a different mode? Some sense of returning conqueror? AND, it was so lively and beautiful and seemingly wasteful. Oh my, I can hold contradictory feelings ast.
Random NYC photos heading into and up the East River:

NYU ferry w/Ms Liberty to left

Carousel in white square

Add caption

Alignment sisters

Spiral bldg

59th St/Queensboro Bridge

East Side Highway complete with ivy of some kind

House on roof

Hard to see in the photo to the right but just about center, there is a pink/mauve house on the roof of a building. The decorations on the tops of so many buildings are stunning. This house on a building was pretty unique.

Tagging

Below is a very colorful example of local, I assume, art. Vibrant colors!









I totally missed Hell Gate excitement which was minimal since we (the Captains) timed it so well and I was talking with my friend.

We arrived in Port Washington, a pretty and pretty empty harbor this time of the year, contrasted to the busy harbor back in October. Only a few people on moorings so we got close to shore.

We'd made the entire passage in about 5 hours so we were in before lunchtime. Perfect time for a nap on the aft deck in the sun. Easy to sleep in the beach chairs we bought in Marathon. Afterward, some computer work (MAC TA application) and trip to town and grocery store w/friends.

David and I had a conversation about how the remainder of our trip was to evolve. He wanting to see Don and Dianne and visit Mystic Museum. Both outings I want to support but cannot see how to do both those things AND get me to a place I can get some transportation home before 5/21. That is the last and ONLY dance class I'll get to attend and I've a doctor appointment on 5/23. I don't trust David's sense of amount of time things take. It took at least a month for us to travel to Port Washington on the way south. I'm pretty sure it will take more than 10 days to travel home from here. I wonder if he is taking my need to get home seriously. He declares he does. He reminds me that days are longer now and we travel more than the 5 or 6 hours we were able to travel in the fall. I'd not considered that. Still, travel takes time and David's sense of time is not as acute as mine. So....I'm concerned. He assures me. We'll see. I don't want to leave the boat before it is home. I do want to finish this voyage with David, not before. And I want to continue the journey not just look for the destination. blah blah blah

5/9/16       Monday         Great Kill, NJ                   crowded


Another pre-dawn exit from our haven for the evening.  The sun was squashed as it rose. Doesn't really show up in the photo.

goodbye Barnegat, hello sun

We followed a shrimp boat out the inlet. A great leader. The current was nearly slack but we were getting quite a push on our way out. A  good thing. We'll take all the help we can get!

Beautiful, beautiful ride close along the Jersey coast and its wonderful barrier island, sandy beaches. Why did I not take photos? The beaches reminded me so much of NC Outer Banks and how I do love those beaches.

I emailed friend, Martin, who I knew had a house on the NJ shore, to see where it was so that I could wave. He told me and I waved. Lovely connection. Easy ride until we turned west around Sandy Hook. In spite of what is generally a crowded shipping lane there was very little BIG traffic, mostly little pleasure fishing craft, a few charter fishing boats and some ferry traffic. Most of the barges were on the side of the shipping channel to stay out of the way of dredges.

Charter plotter screen

This is what our electronic chart looked like going toward the Hook - lanes for traffic, Lat/Long lines, the black bullet at lower center represents Grace and the course she is tracking. Orange blotches represent stuff the radar is picking up - buoys, boats, maybe waves, islands, seashore breakers.

All was well and easy...until we crossed the shipping lane heading northwest for Great Kill. Then the wind kicked up to 20+ kts with gusts to 30, straight down the river and against the tide. Aaaarrgh. At one point going into the narrow inlet at Great Kill we were titling at 20 degrees and being set toward the Red Nun that marks shoaling and shallow water. David asked me to quickly research other possible safe havens. I researched on Active Captain. The few in the 10 mile radius were worse choices...shallow entrance or even less protection once inside the harbor. Suck it up and keep going. We did and our buddies followed us. They may never follow us again. I called out the depths to David and watched the buoys behind us to make sure David was adjusting to the set of the wind and current. The most shallow we saw as we skidded into the inlet and harbor was 5'9''. We draw 4'3". Plenty of water! Sure.

Both boats got in safely and...what a crowd of mooring balls, none for rent or loan. Well, we could have "borrowed" one, I'm sure, but you never know what's under the water and how well maintained the mooring is unless you know or are told. And the wind was to continue to be stiff through the night. And the harbor isn't that well protected from the west. So we searched for a vacant patch in enough but not too much water (more than 6, less than 20') to anchor. Got it! and Dream Catcher just behind us.'

Bird lunch

A little beer on the aft deck in the sun out of the wind. We watched a cormorant wrestle a too big fish for about 5 minutes before finally getting it down its gullet. The white blob at the top of the bird's neck is the fish she is swallowing.

We joined our friends on their boat for dinner...early dinner around 5:30...and to plan the next day's crossing. Conquer the East River of NYC and Hell Gate from the south! We'll leave by 5:00 AM. I'm off to bed at 7:30 anticipating no difficulty sleeping.

5/8/16        Sunday              Barnegat, NJ             AT LAST.............

.........we're out of Brigantine!!! On our way north again. I was beginning to think I was in a "groundhog day" syndrome.

We and our buddy boaters were up at 4:00 AM and creeping carefully out of the anchorage in the mere half-light of pre-dawn. A bit tricky but we still had the "bread crumb" pathway from coming into the anchorage on our chart plotter. And I was on the foredeck with the flashlight looking for the buoys.

We lumped a bit getting out of the inlet but .... into the SUN! How beautiful!

Coming out fromAtlantic City/Brigantine - Abescon Inlet

sun magic

Even the large buildings of Atlantic City casinos are rendered in beauty with the magic of sun reflections.

We kept buddy boat in easy sight, traveling off shore 2-3 miles. We had to empty our holding tank so took ourselves out beyond the 3 mile marker. Mostly a gentle day of motoring with the mizzen up for steadying and a bit of jib to get a little pull from the wind.

We worried about going into Barnegat since that had been such a terror and bad news on the way down - washing machine inlet with wind against waves/tide, running aground and wrapping our prop and being towed. That was a full daylight nightmare...but in the past.

We lead the way into the inlet as our buddies had not been there before. Swift entry but easy enough. Hard turn to port, past the dredge (always a dredge which is a good thing, sort of...the results are good - deeper channel). Then a confusing marker and some other boat (maybe the dredge) called to give us instructions. Buddy boater, Gary, took the lead.

Lo and behold there were some other buddies in the anchorage. David called the yacht club that was reported to have mooring balls, "yes, they are free" so we picked up one and Gary took the other. Home for the evening.

Barnegat view this evening

Friends, Larry and Shannon, dinghied over to ask if we wanted fish. Yes. Salmon would be great. They went to the fish market (and walked their dog) and brought back a lovely pound of salmon and some ice for drinks.

To bed early. Another really early day tomorrow. We're trying to make lots of miles in this week of fair weather.

It really feels good to be moving along again as if there may be a future on land and an end to this particular aspect of this particular journey. It was really getting trying, being on the boat, seeing and doing the same/same, and being cold, bored, sense of "trapped." Lightning up not that the sun is out again.

5/7/16         Saturday           Brigantine, NJ               POOL!!! and SUNSHINE!!!!!!

It’s hard to not be grumpy after 4 days on the hook in a small boat on gray, windy, cold days. I didn’t get up until the invitation to go to town came at 1100 hours. Instead of being grumpy, as all yesterday, I just stayed in bed and slept. But the possibility of town with friends and visiting a sea mammal rescue center was great news. And it was supposed to become patchy sunny as the afternoon flowed.

Off to town which means a chilly dinghy ride w/friends, I get to pull the dinghy onto shore because I have my “wellies” (aka garden boots) on and the shore is sucky mud or slippery seaweed depending the level of the tide.

Saw the mammal rescue center with several exhibits and live streaming video of the rescued seals in various states of recovery. A small operation with some smart dedicated young people and a founder. On to the hardware store. Then to the Family Dollar store for a speaker so we can watch DVDs in stereo and loud enough for David to hear. Then….

POOL! In the bar/liquor store/pool hall. Well, pool hall? Only one pool table. I’ve never been a pool player. Not good at the geometry that allows one to be skilled. And haven’t held a pool cue since sometime after a Bates performance and big student/faculty party across from the Bates bookstore. But, hey, let’s do it.

Had a blast. Hit several balls solidly and got several in pockets. A couple times even two balls to pockets in a row. Great fun and no pressure.

Home to boat in the SUNSHINE!!! What is that weird color above us. Dinner at our boat. Store-bought quiche. Bed early for a really early LEAVING Brigantine tomorrow!

5/6/16        Friday        Brigantine, NJ             still.....

Wind, Wind, Wind and Gray, Gray, Gray. And Chilly, Cold, Cold, Snarky, Snarky

The sun DID come out today and we all couldn’t figure out what was happening it has been so long since we’d seen it. Thank goodness our buddy boat friends rescued us – again – from each other and another dreary day on the cold boat.

We dinghied to shore, walked and walked to the hardware store to drop off our propane tank then walked and walked some more to the liquor store. Went to the beach. Waves were small breakers but very frequent and really windy. We all congratulated ourselves on being in a good anchorage and not in the ocean.

We, mostly David and I, lugged our heavy collection of wine and alcohol back to the hardware store. There we bought a new propane tank and hitched a ride with one of the store staff back to the PO across from the dinghy.  Made it in time to buy stamps and mail our property tax check assuring that it will get there before due date. Phew! Back in the dinghy and home to Grace.

Friends came aboard for wine and dip that Jayne made and gave us. Warm, Cozy friends. They left and David and I had small dinner and a long conversation about our boating, aging future.

David learned that James Brown is thinking to sell his Nauticat. It is like ours with a much newer engine and some “improvements” like a shower and a composting toilet. It is in Boot Key. He asked that I just “go with” the fantasy of us buying it (a water home in ME and one in FL) for a few minutes. I tried. Couldn’t really do it. Not while being stuck for several days in grey, cold weather on a cold, small boat in a strange harbor - pond of water, really, not a harbor with facilities.

Really, a boat in FL, a boat and a house in ME and a lot in FL???!? And not any boatS but two live-aboard boatS. How are we to support such lavishness, financially or geographically? Especially after just dipping into investments to pay property taxes in Maine? Sell the ME house? Possibly. But I’m not ready to give up my land-based home. I doubt that I’ll ever be ready to give up a land-based home.  My sense of security is dramatically tied to land. David has been telling people I want to get back to gardening. That is partly true. But those are his words for why I want to get home to ME, the reason HE can think of. I want to get to my house – from which I expect to eliminate lots of stuff so that I feel more mobile and it is more rentable for future adventures away – to the land and plants and neighbors and friends and earth/dirt. I’m not interested in loosing that earth connection.

 We ended the conversation with neither of us pleased. Not sure of the future of these machinations. I appreciate David’s thinking about how to not live in Maine in the winters, and we both know living on Grace (without the travel) is way more affordable than any additional house, owned or rented. And we agree that the down and back travel is to be avoided somehow. We talked about buying a small powerboat for Maine and putting Grace on the hard in the south in the summer months.  Lots to consider and options to discover and play with. But the notion of purchasing another live-aboard boat and getting rid of land-based home in order to afford it?  Not a good time to bring that possibility up after 4 dreary cold days on the hook, dependent upon others to get to land.

5/5/16          Thursday        Brigantine, NJ


Keeping up w/blog via word document journal.

Cinco de Mayo!!! Feels and looks like November with a gale a blowin’.  David is more bored than I am. I didn’t even get out of my jammies today. Just put clothes on over them. Not expecting to go anywhere in the wind, deflated dinghy and cold.

Staying warm

Made soup. Did some computer work. Read a bit. Did some FACA volunteer work. Researched our collection of LED lights and decided they are not what we want on boat (too r&r light show type and require AC connection). David looked for lamp oil (for heat) without finding any and looked for lamp wick without finding large enough piece. We both wondered where the pipe insulation that we used as draft doggers was stored. David realized we had that on our first attempt at ICW way back there in fall 2014. So, probably didn’t bring it with us. Noodles are prettier colors anyway and can be color coded to specific places.

Meanwhile, we look for ways to conserve heat, keep it in rather than try to heat the entire outside of NJ.

Did some good work – David did, really – on FACA fundraising and drafting a Prospectus for the same. Trying to fund an option on a building that many of us have eyed for years as a theater/arts & cultural center for Freeport. We have a board meeting that we will phone into. Hoping to be productive and helpful even while feeling outside our funding element.

Blog update is that several Bates staff have had same problem so wondering if it is Bates system-wide distress OR Google-wide distress. Smarter people are researching it.

We’re trying not to get snippy in our boredom. I’m trying to not feel guilty for not working on the same things, in the same way, that David is working on.

rain, wind, cold

My hero over there to starboard!

5/4/16        Wednesday        Brigantine, NJ            STILL here!

Back in the blog again....to the tune of Back in the Saddle Again.

Our big adventure was a trip to town…a flotilla of 2 dinghies. I went in one with Larry and Shannon, David followed with Jayne and Gary. It was a long way to the end of this little lake/inlet we’re in but a comfortable enough ride w/friends even with the wind cooling all our body parts, especially exposed hands and noses. Pearl the dog was shivering. She’s lost her winter coat in FL and this feels like November weather.

Town was neat enough – food store, Dollar Store, hardware or automotive store for the men, drug store for the women. Checked into the liquor (package) store which was also a bar and pool hall. Whoa! To expensive for either family. Back to beer and coffee.

Back on the boat, tried to stay warm in the saloon with the propane heater. When that didn’t work, back to bed. I’m back to reading a book I’d put down for a while, Waiting for Snow in Cuba. Enjoying it more now that we’ve moved out of the author’s childhood under Batista. It's such a complicated history we have w/Cuba. The Bay of Pigs debacle was horrible as was much of relationship since.

I’ve made some inquiries regarding my lack of access to my blog. This is frustrating in that I don’t know where the problem lies – at Bates or at Google or with my luddite-ness. It is too frustrating. I don’t want to start emailing my ramblings to friends or followers, especially since I don’t know who the followers are.

Late dinner. Some work on FACA. Chilly and waiting for wind to abate….in 3 days.

5/3/16         Tuesday            Atlantic City, NJ....still

We’re here for a while. High winds from wrong direction. High seas…from any direction would be a no-go. Storm clouds.

Not sure if it is the closing in on the end of our journey or just the clouds and lack of travel movement but I’m very reflective today. Also, up early in the quiet with kitty but David still sleeping.

I’m wondering about closing doors…to opportunities, to hurts, to people, to risk. Which doors do I purposefully close and how tightly. I declined a MAC job for the summer, not realizing exactly what the job was but even so, not wanting to go that road just now. So a door closed but not slammed and not shut tightly, I hope.

What doors to allow to close? What doors to purposefully keep cracked a bit? What doors to fling open with wild abandon without knowing what is possible(y) on the other side?

I’m curious about the relationships I’ll end? Or let slide? Or nurture? How will I choose. Will there be a difference in the land-based friendships and the water-based friendships. On the water they have been short with some intensity due to the nature of travel and newness.

On the boat today we burped the heating system in hopes of having more heat when we are underway again…and a couple of games of “Take 2” after dinner.

Photos of the Atlantic City light show from last night:

Fog or not, advertisements go on

wonder how much ad costs

These are from the casinos in Atlantic City, across harbor from Brigantine.

From the true distance

5/2/16         Monday          Brigantine (Atlantic City), NJ


Into the fog! That was our rallying cry this morning as we left Cape May. Opodamus left. Kindred Spirit left. Grace left to get fuel. Dream Catcher left. Lots of other boats we don't know left, too. Seems we were among the last of friends to leave BUT when we got to Utschs Marine I heard someone calling my name "Hey Nancy" and there were Shannon and Larry (Emma Jean from  Castine) on the dock.

We finally got out into the big, mighty and very foggy Atlantic Ocean at 9:45-ish. Big rolly-polly seas, wind mostly a light 5-8 knots and on our nose (of course). But on our nose is fine as we plowed into the seas rather than taking them on our beam which would have been really uncomfortable. And the waves were sustained motion, no whitecaps. So we had to hold on all the time but weren't being pounded.

The stress was the fog. I'm really appreciating my childhood flying by instruments experiences during which I couldn't see ANYTHING outside the small plane window. Nothing. Only moisture drops on the airplane windows and the struts and tips of the wings. It was not quite that soupy today. We could see about 1/4 mile. Mostly waves. On our navigation screen we saw triangles representing boats w/AIS (automatic identification system) signals and orange blobs representing objects (mostly boats) seen by radar. Surprises were the occasional crab pot. But it was intense not being able to see clearly, and the holding on as the waves rolled us up and down and side to side. Sometimes I was reminded of standing in the water (I was looking out the cabin window in this case) but remembering standing in the water at the beach and waiting for a body surfing wave. Watching/waiting as those big rollers that weren't ready to break passed me by.

And we had hitchhikers -

migrating hitchhikers

We only had three who stayed from noon until we arrived in Atlantic City. They looked to be in the Sparrow family, one larger one all brown, and two smaller, fluffy ones with yellow eye bars. They looked young. A Gold Finch and a Blue Bird came for a brief visit but didn't hang around. And a bird totally unknown to me - tiny, 2" with some muddy green markings on grey with pointy beak and big, round eyes, pale yellow circles around eyes. I'd never had birds hitchhike so this was a treat. I crumbled corn chips and put on the aft deck where they were hanging and a coffee lid of water. They enjoyed the feast and pooped for us. They left the boat when we got close to our anchorage and the sun came out. Don't know if they thought we were slackers coming in before dark, and continued their journey or not. Glad to have them hitch a ride w/us though. We helped the migration.

As we got close to the Absecon Inlet the boats started talking to each other to see how conditions were. A trawler that had been in to this inlet frequently called back to say it was completely clear and sunny just inside the inlet. What a relief. Trying to enter an unfamiliar inlet and anchorage in the fog would have been a nail biter. As soon as we cleared the inlet the fog began to life.

floating building

We anchored beside Dream Catcher, took a short nap on the aft deck in the warm sun. That should help lower the shoulders, raised from holding on and squinting into the fog. Jayne and Gary came over for snacks and we plotted the next couple of days. Tomorrow is a no go-er. Maybe a dinghy trip to the store. Wednesday might be a long day to Sandy Hook. There will be a lot of weather checking before Wednesday. Isn't there a Bruce Springsteen song about packing up the band equipment to leave a gig and tomorrow "get up and do it again" or something like that? Feeling like that these days of boating, or boating/layover day after day.

Houses around the anchorage - Atlantic City buildings
in the fog in background

Sun is out in anchorage

A couple of photos from the last several days -

Densely packed shrimp boats just outside Cape May

Amelia questions where and WHY
we're going again